once upon a time...

i lived with this really spoiled brat.
i mean spoiled spoiled.
her parents paid for everything ever.
she bought everything on her credit card which her stepdad paid.
her mom bought her a brand new car when she graduated high school.
did i mention she was 19?
she also thought she was the hottest thing ever.
even though she was overweight.
she had bleached blonde hair, big thighs, and a huge teeth.
her favorite things were to get drunk and have really loud sex so the whole house could hear.
well i finally had enough of her crap and annoying behavior and her attitude towards me so i moved out.
upon moving out she took the liberty of opening and throwing away all of my mail.
havent talked to the girl since i moved out and hesterday she texts me.
heres our conversation:
her: hey you dont by chance have my wax...? :)
me: i bought you a new can in january. it should be sitting on your dresser for months. oh and p.s. you might want to spread the word that opening someone elses mail is a federal offense with up to 5 years in jail :)
(ok dont tell her but i may have slightly exaggerated...i just wanted to scare her!)
her: what are you even talking about. uhh. there is no wax on my dresser. why wouldnt you text me and tell me where you put it. aaaand i didnt open your mail. maybe get your address changed :)
me: i told you when i bought it. we had a whole conversation about it. maybe you were too drunk to remember.
her: weird. k cool. well hope all is well at the new place. your very much missed :D
me: XOXO

i dont know why i got such a kick out of this.
i mean i was a little fired up, mostly cause i hate her is why.
but whatev.
dont have to deal with that anymore :]